Any discussion of caregiving most often focuses on the person receiving care, but Dolly Parton’s story serves to remind us that caregivers need care too. By her own admission, Dolly put her health and well-being aside while she cared for her husband during his final years. She acknowledged missing check-ups, brushing off symptoms, and putting herself last on the priority list. After putting her own needs on hold, Dolly passed away a little over a year after her husband.
Dolly’s story isn’t unique: in 2025 approximately 63 million Americans (nearly one in four adults) cared for a parent, spouse or another loved one with a chronic illness, disability or serious medical condition, providing 40 or more hours a week of care. Taking on what is effectively a second full-time job results in emotional stress and physical strain that cannot be overlooked.
How and why does it happen that caregivers find themselves struggling?
- Chronic stress wears on the body, raising blood pressure, affecting sleep and weakening the immune system, leading the caregivers themselves to get sick.
- Self-care disappears quietly, one skipped thing at a time. A rescheduled medical appointment, neglecting an exercise routine, grabbing fast food for dinner rather than cooking a healthy meal are all small pebbles that create huge waves.
- Asking for help can feel like admitting defeat. Spouses and children often feel a sense of responsibility or duty to care for their loved one that makes accepting support for themselves during this time feel wrong.
If you are a caregiver, what steps can you take to nurture yourself and ensure that your caregiving work is successful:
- Book your own check-up! Don’t wait any longer and do it so that your loved one can continue counting on a healthy you for a long time to come.
- Watch for burnout and be honest when you recognize troubling behavior. Constant exhaustion, snapping at trivial inconveniences, trouble sleeping, among other signs are all indications of caregiver burnout.
- Call the professionals when necessary. Connecting with a home health agency, or a palliative care or hospice provider allows skilled medial workers to become part of your caregiving team.
- Lean on a group of supporters. Whether it’s a friend, faith community, support group or a running buddy, take the time to share your feelings and your story. Talking to others helps more than you think.
- Take the “after” seriously. If your caregiving season is ending or has recently ended, take the time to grieve. Feeling a loss of purpose is common, and it takes time and effort to rebuild. Treat yourself with the same grace and care as you treated your loved one. You deserve it!
Dolly Parton left her mark on much more than the country music world, and her legacy begs us to take care of ourselves just as well as we take care of others.
